Just to put this straight, no metaphor, no shits. I'm jus kinda sick cuz I have to bear everything; from getting shame in front of other people to holding up responsibilities which I do not have to bear.
People could see that, and we know it. But I am still stuck in this shit, unable to free myself. Relationship, at times, sucks~ probably I know I aint those social typa guy~ I don't need much frens cuz I, being me, doesn't really like company. So maybe it's time to put it straight. I hate the way people control my life, and I dislike what is going on in my life. Perhaps I should just shut myself in some caves and let go of all my concern; be a jungle man. Be a Hadza~ live without time, and when I'm dead, no one cares~ let me contribute to the nature, cuz I, being a part of nature, have never really done anything to compensate what I've eaten, and all that I wasted; water, electricity.
I don't need people to help me, and because of some people I realized that I'm becoming more resourceful. Being resourceful is not necessarily bad, u know~ sometimes eating your own shit, like a rabbit, is part of what makes me a selfish person.
Selfish I may be~ with Pride rooting deep inside me~ perhaps the appropriate place for me~ is Hell itself. I guess not even the Devil himself could outdo me in terms of pride. for now~ I would say, relationship sucks. Friendship sucks. Team Spirit sucks. I don like to say this, but some times we do hate our parents. and most of the times we hate our boy/girl friend.
I don't want to drag on further. I have stated this long time ago. Putting this in my heart for so long. The burden is becoming overwhelming. Maybe, the best friend for me, are my football boots, my music instruments and my computer. they, for one, never vent their anger at me, and respect me, and yea... they provide comfort and joy and... they make me proud~!